第3-4节(第3/5页)



  艾米:梦里飘向你(4)

  DILDO 的问题是一个科学的问题,来不得半点的虚伪和骄傲。

  以上改编自伟人毛泽东的格言,仅将“知识”换成了 DILDO 。

  偷梁换柱,天衣无缝。

  DILDO 的知识,也是知识。

  凡有关知识的事,都来不得半点的虚伪和骄傲。

  难道有什么事可以来半点的虚伪和骄傲吗?

  没有。可见伟人的话也有可能是废话。

  维基百科对 DILDO 有非常科学技术的解说:

  Definition: ( 定义 )

  A dildo is a sex toy, often explicitly phallic in appearance, intended for bodily penetration during self-administered masturbation or sex with a partner or partners.

  ( 仿科技翻译: DILDO 是一种“性玩具”,通常为xxxx形,用于手淫时,也用于与一个或多个伴侣的性活动。 )

  Description: ( 描绘 )

  A non-vibrating device, resembling the penis in shape, size, and overall appearance, is a dildo. Some people include vibrating devices in this definition.

  ( 仿关键词翻译:非震动型器具,形状,大小,外观都与xxxx相似。也有人把震动型器具包括在内。 )

  Etymology: ( 辞源 )

  The word “dildo” originally referred to the phallus-shaped peg used to lock an oar in position on a dory (small boat). It would be inserted into a hole on the side of the boat, and is very similar in shape to the modern toy.

  ( 仿解释性翻译: DILDO 原指一种xxxx状楔子,可插在船边的小洞里,将船桨固定于船身。形状与xxxx相似,现被用来称呼此类性玩具。 )

  当性是禁忌话题时,一个有关 DILDO 的暗示都可能引起冲动。但当性成为科学技术的话题时,大篇关于 DILDO 的描写都不会引起冲动,最多只引起你对知识的敬畏 — 如果你能敬畏知识的话。对那些不敬畏知识的人来说,科学技术的话题只能引起他们的头疼。

  当 DILDO 成为商业话题时,顾客们关心的是产品的质量和价格:

  ( 以下均为仿信达雅翻译 )

  某甲: This product is nice for on your own or if you partner is using it on you. I’m only allowed to buy toys that are smaller then my hubby 。。。

  ( 该产品无论是你自用还是由性伴侣为你使用都挺不错的。我丈夫只让我买比他那玩意小的性玩具。。。 )

  某乙: When I first received this item I thought it was going to be just what I needed and hoped it would be. Looked promising. Sadly, I don’t think any toy can be as realistic as a human being. 。。。

  ( 我刚收到该产品的时候,以为会如愿以偿,看上去也的确会令我如愿以偿,可惜,我认为没哪种性玩具能比男人的那玩意更逼真。。。 )

  某丙: I thought the size was really good, not too big as described in other reviews. In fact, I nearly didn’t order it because of some of the negative reviews, but I loved it!!

  ( 我觉得该产品的大小挺好的,不象有些顾客评价的那样太大。那些顾客的负面评价搞得我差点不敢买这玩意。我喜欢该产品。 )

  某丁: The best part can only be found on close examination… at the top, near the “frenum”… a little happy face! And happy he makes me indeed. This is very lifelike, and I am certain they used my husband for the mold! VERY close to identical… husband has no happy face on his weenie, just on his face… but since he left, and I have no one to play with, Mr. Smiley will do my just fine! Do it! Get one! Worth it!

  ( 最妙的一点你得仔细观察才能发现,在 DILDO 的顶端,靠近龟xx ( 下那根“欠筋” ) 的地方,有个小小的笑脸,让我太开心了。这玩意太逼真了,我敢肯定他们是照着我丈夫的那玩意做的,几乎一模一样,不过我丈夫那玩意上没有笑容,他脸上才有,但是既然他离开了,我没人玩了,跟笑脸先生玩是一样美妙。快去买一个吧 ! 值得一买 !)

  感谢网络 !

  有了网络,才有了这么方便的购买途径,才能这么坦率地谈论 DILDO 。

  在网下, DILDO 可能仍是禁忌话题,因为它与性有关,是用来满足 ( 女人 ) 性欲的。

  人们可以堂而皇之地满足口欲。上哪家餐馆,吃那样山珍海味,味道如何,价格公道不公道,在家如何烹调,加几勺糖,放几粒胡椒,都可以堂而皇之地讨论。

  但对于性欲的满足,却不能公开谈论。